Time spent in the company of friends is purposed to be precious. If you have been wondering how to redirect friendships that have become less-than-encouraging, Leslie continues sharing how to have God-honoring get-togethers in this week’s episode. Listen as she uncovers two common pitfalls in many girls’ gatherings and proposes a refreshing, biblical solution to idle chit-chat and chick flicks.
Amy Carmichael once cautioned about how easy it is for friendships to be based around idle chit-chat, “wasting precious hours by deliberate choice on things not worthwhile.” And while not every conversation has to be super-serious, mindless chatter that glamorizes Facebook fads and promotes pop-culture’s values will cause us to be distracted from Christ and preoccupied with worldliness. The Bible makes it clear that we are placed on this earth to redeem the time God has given us in an eternally-focused way (read Ephesians 5:16).
Typical Girls’-Night Activity: Idle Chatter
Jim Elliot once said, “Live every day as if the Son of Man were at the door, and gear your thinking to the fleeting moment. Just how can it be redeemed? Walk as if the next step would carry you across the threshold of Heaven.” This portrays the opposite spirit of idle chatter and frivolous banter in our conversations with others and is a great thought to keep in mind when approaching gatherings with friends.
The Bible has much to say on idle chatter (see Key Scriptures below). Consider evaluating your pastimes and conversations with friends in light of Heaven’s values. The following questions can be helpful as you take this area of your life before the Lord.
Helpful Questions to Evaluate Conversations With Friends:
- Do these words point people to Jesus Christ and reflect His nature?
- Does this conversation, post, statement serve a higher purpose than to fill space?
- Do my conversation habits honor God or esteem the shallow things of this world?
- Is this activity or conversation distracting me from Christ or causing me to adopt ungodly values of the world?
God-Honoring Alternative: Edifying Truth
We all have room to improve in our conversations with others — be it friends, family, or passersby on the street. However, if God is leading you to change your approach to conversing with others it can be hard to know where to begin.
While each situation is different, prayerfully ask God whether it is more appropriate to quietly excuse yourself from the conversation or redirect the discussion into more edifying territory. It’s also helpful to come prepared to a get-together with questions and topics of discussion that will lend to edifying conversation. Here are a few to get you started!
Edifying Conversation Staters:
- What has God been teaching you spiritually in this season of your life?
- Would you mind sharing a story of God’s faithfulness in your life recently?
- What have you been studying in God’s word lately?
- What are your hopes and dreams for the future?
- Could you please share a sweet memory from your childhood?
- *Note: The last two questions are especially helpful for conversations with those who don’t know the Lord.
Typical Girls’-Night Activity: Chick Flicks
An edifying, inspiring, clean movie can be a fun way to gather friends and enjoy an evening, but we must be mindful not to fall into the common pitfalls that allow immorality to sneak into
our gatherings just because we’re watching a chick flick. Remember, our standards should be just as high when we’re with our girlfriends as they are in every other situation.
Two Areas to Evaluate When Watching Movies:
- The kind of movie we’re watching
- The amount of movies we’re watching
God-Honoring Alternative: Real-Life Christian Heroes
We often seek the thrill of drama, adventure, and romance through a silver screen and forget that the heroes of the faith lived real lives that boast amazing adventure and tell of overcoming obstacles that lead us to see the incredible faithfulness of God!
If you are looking for non-screen ways to spend your time, consider cooking or baking a meal together for someone in need, take a hike or walk together while sharing prayer requests, or read through a Christian biography together. (Here is an inspiring list of lives worth studying!)
Godly friendships are a wonderful gift from Heaven, so be sure to seek ways to honor Him in how we use this gift. The world has its own formula, but God’s pattern is more enjoyable and satisfying! We will come away uplifted, refreshed, and fulfilled when our friendships glorify things that are set on eternity!
- 1 John 2:15-17
- Ephesians 5:16
- Proverbs 14:23b
- Matthew 12:36
Leslie’s latest article from Issue 23, A God-Honoring Girls’ Night, will help you take these principles deeper into your friendships!